I believe that if we are moving toward a world of total equality, then it needs to be equal across the board. You cannot pick and choose only the parts of progress that benefit you while clinging to traditional privileges. I often see people who advocate for dismantling the patriarchy yet still expect men to fulfill the most demanding traditional roles, like being the primary provider or paying for every single date. In many cultures, traditional roles are a two-way street: the man acts as the protector and provider, and in return, there is a specific set of expectations for the partner. It is a balance of duties and rewards. When someone demands the benefits of modern independence but still expects a man to act like a 1950s gentleman, it creates an unfair double standard. If you want a man who rejects 'toxic masculinity' and embraces emotional vulnerability, you should not be upset if he wants to split the bill or express himself through non-traditional fashion. Real equality means giving up the perks of the old system if you are going to fight against its restrictions. Consistency is the only way to build a truly fair relationship dynamic in the modern world.
Relationships are personal, not political manifestos, and they should be about two people finding a dynamic that makes them happy. Being against systemic patriarchy—like the gender pay gap, legal inequality, or social restrictions—does not mean a person is forbidden from enjoying traditional romantic gestures or wanting a partner with masculine energy. It is not 'hypocrisy' to want equality in the workplace and the voting booth while preferring a traditional courtship style in your private life. We should be able to choose which traditions we keep and which we discard based on what works for our specific partnership. Expecting a man to pay for a date or preferring a certain type of masculine behavior is often just a matter of personal attraction and dating preference, not an endorsement of an entire oppressive system. The goal of modern equality is choice: the choice to be a CEO, a stay-at-home parent, or anything in between. We should move away from rigid 'all or nothing' rules and allow couples to negotiate their own structures without labeling them as inconsistent. Enjoying chivalry doesn't mean you support the suppression of women's rights.