I found out my partner has been reading my private messages with friends when I leave my phone unlocked. They say if I have nothing to hide, it shouldn't matter. But I feel violated. I have private conversations with my friends that are none of their business. Trust should mean you DON'T feel the need to check.
I glanced at their phone once and saw a message that seemed flirty from a coworker. After that I started checking occasionally. I'm not controlling — I'm protecting our relationship. If they were more transparent I wouldn't need to check. Everyone in a relationship has a right to know what's going on.